Friday, April 16, 2010

Feast or Famine?

OK, this was kind of a tough week. Not in terms of my eating or even the exercise that I added in (programmed exercise begins in Week 3 of Vtrim), but in terms of my thinking. Yep, you heard me right. It was my thoughts that gave me trouble this week. Even though I stayed with my eating plan, exercised more than the requisite amount, and successfully navigated the potentially dangerous waters of dining out TWICE, I still had to deal with those pesky old thought patterns that plague even the best of us.

It all started when I seemed to be gaining back some weight after last week’s amazing four pound weight loss. I had been following the Vtrim program diligently – recording all my food and staying within my allotted calories. In fact, I had even begun to add in regular exercise, so I couldn’t figure out what was wrong.

As far as I could tell, I was doing everything right, but the number on the scale was still moving in the wrong direction. ACK! I started to panic. Fear kicked in and the voice of the Drill Sergeant (my internal critic) started bellowing, “This is not going to work. You can’t eat like a normal person and lose weight. You’ve got to deprive yourself if you want to see the pounds come off.”

WHOA! Where did THAT come from? Did I just hear myself say that losing weight = depriving myself? So that’s what was going on! All my years of dieting had taught me to associate weight loss with deprivation and quick results. Now that the scale wasn’t giving me immediate gratification, I had fallen back into my old belief patterns.

Deep down, I was having trouble believing that I could eat like a normal person and still lose weight. And yet, eating like a normal person is the heart of the Vtrim program. It’s not about quick results derived from deprivation, but creating a new relationship with food that can last a lifetime.

I have to confess that believing I can lose weight while eating well is still a new concept for me. When I’m not seeing those external results on the scale, it’s easy to let fear sabotage my efforts by convincing me that I need to do something drastic if I want to succeed. But the truth is that changing deeply engrained patterns takes time. And I have years of feast or famine, either/or thinking in this brain of mine.

So while I’m giving myself time to adjust to this alternate way of thinking, I’ve come up with a new strategy. I’ve decided to lighten up. Instead of letting the daily numbers on the scale determine my sense of success, I’m focusing on the big picture – eating what’s good for me, getting regular exercise, and staying within my allotted calorie allowance. If I can keep my attention there – on the new behaviors that can change my life – I’m pretty confident that the scale will take care of itself.

2 comments:

  1. That's tough, Martha. And it does not help that our society tends to measure people's worth in numbers, whether it's how little you weight or how much money you make. I know that you know better than that, but it's so hard to compete with the prevailing attitudes, even when we know better. How often do you weigh yourself? (I am not familiar with Vtrim.) A better measurement is how you FEEL. I am not saying anything you don't already know -- just adding another (positive) voice to the chorus of voices who seek to drown out that judge in your head. :-)

    Your meals sound delicious. Wish I could enjoy them with you! I support you in this. Health and pleasure can and should go together!

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  2. Thanks for your input, Krista. I appreciate the support!

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